1. How to Knit.
I want to make scarves and hats, that’s all. Nothing fancy-schmancy. Just simple things to be cute and keep me warm.
Really. I can’t do a darn thing to make my house sell any faster. I can’t MAKE a toddler understand adult logic any better. If my husband doesn’t want to take the garbage out right this very second, there’s not really a lot of harm in waiting a little while. (Really. There’s not. Put down the trash bag and CHILL.) I can’t force things to happen on my time-line just because I feel like it. I just need to learn to breathe and deal.
3. Just because someone else doesn’t like/prefer something, doesn’t mean I’m wrong for liking/preferring it. It just means people are different.
There are the parents who mock or criticize the “character-themed anything.” Or pink/blue. Or actually having proof that there are toys in the house. Just because I like some character-themed somethings (and even put them out for others to see!) doesn’t make me a bad person. Or a worse parent. It just means I have different tastes. I need to realize that, accept that, and stop thinking that because I don’t think the same as other people out there that *I’m* the weirdo. (I used to pride myself on that, what’s up with that?)
4. How to be a better friend.
Or, I guess, in general – how not to be such a slacker. I have the best of intentions. But the worst follow-through.
5. How to get my eyebrows just – exactly – so. On each side. Perfectly symmetrical.
6. How to be a morning person.
I am a night person. I am the most productive/creative after 10 PM. That I have to get up in the morning is horrible. That I have to get up early – that’s clearly a death wish.
7. How to drink (and like) coffee.
See #6. (Any suggestions?)
8. How to do a little girl’s hair.
Li’l miss M is getting hair now. I’m a little worried. I don’t even know how to do my own hair!
9. Where to keep my car keys so I a) don’t lose them b) don’t get all the way to the car and then realize they’re at my freaking desk or still in the blasted house.
10. To just breathe.