Thursday, January 31, 2013

Caoonting to Zoe

Dear First-Grade Daughter Learning to Spell,

          I know you know I am a bit insane when it comes to spelling. I know your teacher tells you spelling doesn't matter right now, she just wants to get you guys writing words and working on your handwriting. I understand that. I really do. However. I can't let go. Spelling is a big thing for me. A really big thing. So....

         In English, we actually spell it cOUnted (pounce, hound, found, round). The "ou" makes that sound. Unless of course we're writing about a cOW (pow, how, now, bow). Oh, except there is bow that rhymes with tow, like what you would do to a car (row, mow, show, low). Unless, of course, you're writing about the things on the end of your feet, in which case, it would be spelled toe (doe, foe, hoe). But then, oh then, then there is "oe" like in Chloe and Zoe. And you know what? You go right ahead and write it "caoonted." The English language is a terrible form of torture, sweety. We have plenty of years to torment you with it.

                            Love,
                                 Your Mommy Who NEVER in a MILLION YEARS Thought She Would EVER, ever, ever, ever, ever Cave on Spelling

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Mean Girls

I am a mean girl.

No, not the pretty, entitled, popular, mean-just-because-I-can-be kind.  Not the beat-the-holy-living-crap-out-of-you-because-I’m-a-badass kind.

In facing a recent situation, having to take a step back and really examine behaviors, I’ve realized there are mean girls of all kinds.  I wasn’t a “popular” girl in school.  I was never part of “that” crowd.  I was never really part of any “clique.”  I’m still not one of *those* women.  I’m not the rich, spoiled, better –than-anyone, clique-y type.  (Boy, do they scare the hell out of me because I’m surrounded by them.) But that doesn’t mean that there weren’t people I wasn’t nice to.  That there weren't times I stupidly acted like that type of mean girl.  That there haven't been times even now I haven't jumped right on that bad-mouthing, bitch bandwagon and let the cruel freely fly.  

I’ve never deliberately set out to hurt someone, never been blatantly mean or cruel, but I’ve realized it’s my indirect actions that can and have caused just as much pain and hurt.  

I am a kind, nice, fiercely loyal friend who will do anything for those I care about and who has absolutely NO spine whatsoever.  Somewhere along the way (oh senior year of high school without being specific! J ), I was somehow taught that it was not only acceptable, but GOOD! to not treat everyone with equal levels of kindness and respect; if you don’t like someone, by God! don’t treat them like you do! Discriminate for goodness sake.  Treat people how you feel about them; being nice to everyone is fake and weak.  I get the fake.  I have a hard time being fake and an even harder time with people who are fake with me.  It however, has nothing to do with weakness.  The person who can bite her tongue and be the better person is a hell of a lot stronger than the one with diarrhea of the mouth.  There is a fine line between honesty and cruelty and some people need to learn to walk that line a little bit better.  I can often be one of those people.

No, I will probably not change my behavior all that much.  If I don’t like you, I’m not going to kiss your ass or bend over backwards for you.  I do, however, feel quite a bit of guilt for the times in the past when I have made poor judgment calls and hurt people I never meant to; people who thought they were my friends.  Even now, knowing there are people I have hurt (probably even just today!) with my cruel and sometimes unjust words makes me feel like a horrible person.  That’s not who I want to be.

More importantly, I have an example to set.  I have people looking to me to learn how to treat others.  I will not in any way stand for my children thinking it’s okay to pick on others, disrespect anyone or be mean just because they can.  I will also not stand for them thinking it’s okay for anyone to do it to them.  So I will alter my behavior in how I talk about people and how I approach intense, hostile or delicate situations and I will pay much closer attention when I am doing that in front of my children.

While I may be a mean girl, I do not want to raise them.  But damn straight, I will raise strong, independent, think-for-themselves, fierce little chicas.  Now just to find that fine line between the two.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Lessons Learned


Don't believe everything you're told


Go with what *you* know


Apparently not everyone has the impossible expectations of your children that you do. It's okay to back off ocassionally, not often, rarely! and let them act like wild heathens. You don't even have to do it in public. And hey, leave the room if you really can't handle it

Even when you're seatbelted snugly in and wearing a helmet, it doesn't mean you won't get the crap beat out of you from your husband's crazy-ass driving


Always have jackets and umbrellas handy and hey, dummy!!! check the weather first!


Don't think "vacation" is synonymous with "relaxing." Not even for a second. But then don't think dropping your kids off at day care when you get back after spending days in a row with them, going bonkers with their INSANE behavior, won't rip your heart out just a little bit 

Saturday, June 18, 2011

A Week of Miss M. Day Seven.


Dear Miss Moo,

So you're five now.  I'm not really sure where the last five years have gone and since I have been so bad at journaling, blogging, scrapbooking, or keeping any record whatsoever, we're just going to have to assume they really did happen. Looking at you there is no denying it, that's for sure. You've gone from little kid to actual "kid" in the last year alone. You've done so much growing up over the past few months and no one is more aware of it and proud of it than you are. You get so excited when you start learning and mastering a new skill or concept. You love to learn and look at everything new as a "lesson."

You couldn't be more excited to start kindergarten. I believe that's moslty because you have absolutely no idea what you're getting into than it is a true sense of excitement for school, but hey - we'll go with it! You talk about it all the time and are more then eager to tell anyone who will listen that you get to go to kindergarten soon. Truth be told, while I am excited for you too, I'm also a little scared. Growing up is hard stuff. Hard enough when you're the one to have to deal with it, but as the mom, I'm supposed to have all the answers and make it better and easier for you when things are rough. Let me just put this out there now, kid - you think I don't have a clue what I'm doing now?? You just wait! But I promise to always try my best, to always be there for you and to always help you with and through everything no matter what. Except math. That's your dad's job.

You do so many amazing things; so many sweet, smart, funny things every day. One of the most endearing, one of my favorite, is the way you've taken to teaching your sister. You light up when you realize you've taught her something new, a new word, a new trick, how to do something she's still trying to figure out - or just when you can simply get her to laugh with or at you. Not only are you nice to her and share with her (yeah, most of the time), but you take care of her, you look out for her. Honestly, that's not something I really expected. You have a sensitivity about you that is so caring and nurturing and sweet. Sure, sometimes I wonder where on earth it has gone and wonder when the aliens will please return my kind, innocent, sweet little daughter because I've had it UP TO HERE with the EVIL MONSTER who has temporarily taken over. But for the most part, I couldn't have wished for a nicer, more well-behaved, well-mannered child. Yes, young lady, I said *most part.* If the drama of late is any indicator of teenage drama, I just may head for the hills in a few years for a few years. You've got the drama and fits and manipulation down, girl. So ease up a bit, will yah? Sometimes I just can't keep up. And it's another one of those things you teach your sister! And we both know she's dangerous enough without any help.

You love to color, love to do arts and crafts projects. You have such an imagination. We have pictures all over the house that you've drawn and while we've graduated from the unidentifiable images, there are still crazy stories of what things are and what things do to go along with so many of them. Sure, you're fine coloring in coloring books but what you really love is just a plain piece of paper to let your mind go wild and see where the crayons or markers or paint or colored pencils take you.

You love movies and music and dancing and singing. You make up your own songs regularly and love to sing them over and over. And they're pretty decent songs sometimes, too! Pretty sure Nana and Papa will always remember your song about Nana taking all of Papa's teeth. You're clever. You come up with some things that show you pay way more attention to your world and the things around you than we could have ever thought possible. (Yeah, Mommy needs to learn to watch her mouth a whole lot more, I know!) You're a very serious little girl but you do have a sense of humor. So your level of clever and witty is all the more funny when you use it.

You really are an awesome little girl, surrounded by all sorts of people who love and adore you. Yes, you do grow up to fast - that's what kids do. But I am so grateful that I get to be along for the ride and walk (run?) beside you as you do because you make each day an adventure and experience I wouldn't give up or trade in for the world.

Love you mostest,

Mommy

Thursday, June 16, 2011

A Week of Miss M. Day Five.


Five seems like cheating because it really isn't very many. But five is what it is because that's just how it works.

My five favorite things about the gorgeous, sassy, little five year-old:

- She is a strong-willed, independent child who knows what she wants.
- She has an imagination and creative streak the likes of which I never could have imagined.
- She has a very sensitive, very nurturing nature about her.
- She already has a very intense passion for learning and is very inquisitive (and, yes, nosy!).
- She takes such amazing care of her little sister and looks out for her and loves to teach her and is the absolute best big sister ever.