Friday, September 4, 2009

The First Month

So is it bad that the one month update comes before the birth story? Yeah, probably. But what can yah do?

We've all survived the first month. That's something. It's been a bit different this time around in both good ways and bad. It's not as hard as I remember it, and yet in ways, it's harder. 
On a side note, a few weeks ago, I went back and read my archives from when Madeleine was a baby. I don't keep a journal. I don't scrapbook anymore. All I have is what I've put up on this site. I really need to start posting more. I have forgotten/lost way too much from having not noted it here. I need to work on that. Fix it.

In reading the things I learned last time around, I have realized that a- I forgot a whole damn lot and b- each kid may be different but the experience is incredibly similar. Which, I know, is why so many bits become cliche.
Miss M loves being a big sister and is actually really good at it. She adores her baby sister, is a really good helper, and we've only had the ocassional "please ignore her and pay attention to me" moments. I honeslty expected a lot more of those moments given how spoiled she's been the last three years. But she's awesome with it. So far. My moments of guilt have been no fewer than I had expected though. Every time I have to tell her "No," or "Not right now," or "In a minute," my heart breaks a little bit. She's been a real trooper though and actually seems to understand. That doesn't mean she's fit-free, come on, she's three. But she really is a great big sister. It's quite cute to watch her interact with the baby and say the same things we say to her. Nothing is more adorable than watching a three-year old say, "It's okay, baby sister. It's okay, Mommy will take care of you. Hold on a minute," or while rolling her eyes, saying, "That kid!" She's not a fan of the crying, though. She spends a lot of time with her hands over her ears. There are countless times she has fallen asleep like this:

And now for the baby...finally... She's awesome. If she'd sleep she'd be perfect. Actually, let me correct that - if she'd sleep semi-quietly and on her own. This kid is the noisiest baby ever and not in the cute, cooing, baby way. She sounds like a dying baby goat. And it's not just when she's awake. It's when she's fast asleep too. Makes for really long nights. She has a bad case of acid reflux so that doesn't make things very fun either. She spits up a ton and often but is on medication to make it not hurt her when she does. She also gains weight like mad. She's a little piglet. And with as much that comes back up, I really have no idea how she gains weight but she sure does. She gained over a pound in barely more than a week. She's already over 8 pounds and growing quickly.
I expected this time around to be easier, given we've done it before. It's not, not really. I think the frustrating part is that it's the same things that made last time hard. So when it's the same thing both times, it makes me wonder what I am doing wrong. And it also makes it seem harder given that I've had a shot and I'm blowing it again. But it's also significantly easier in the sense that I KNOW this too shall pass. The screaming, the sleepless nights, the inability to put her down and remain sane, the inability to leave the house in any decent amount of time for any decent length of time - it will all end soon. And since I don't think we'll be doing this again, it makes it seem not all so bad. Which is a good, saving thing. It's much more enjoyable this time around knowing that.
Oh, and I almost forgot, when she smiles really big she has the cutest dimples the world has ever seen. I cannot wait until she can smile for real. The cuteness will kill you.

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